you probably don't remember me but i was in your writing class @ xxx in 19xx.
yeah. you probably don't remember me but i remember you.
something you wrote about something that i wrote, changed my entire life.
5 little words.
i never finished it
(the story i was writing)
i never finished writing because
i never finished
falling
down
(wait, i can't send you a letter like this-- all fucked up and messy, can i? i can't write by the rules
capitals, periods, punctuation-- sentences and paragraphs are not for me
i will break my lines
where i see fit.
but you know that so i guess i can just keep going, right?)
i mean, i was a mess when you knew me
at 17
and
i am surely a bigger mess now
(ok, i'm totally not sending this letter)
anyway-- so like, even though i never finished it
(the story)
i kept writing, you know, my thoughts or whatever.......
and in my head i kind of intended for it to become a book someday
yeah
i don't know why i would need to write you a letter
15 years later
that would just be weird........considering
the situation
but like, every time i sit down to write, i can't
when i think of you, i picture you standing in that yellow room
on the second floor
with the graffiti(ed) couch
and the phrase taped to the wall that i can't recall but know really irritated me.
i picture you standing there in your
cardigans
and
square toed shoes
standing with your legs spread so fucking wide
it was unreal
how you stood like that and read our work back to us
in your
billy corgan
voice.
yeah.
i kept all of the notes you wrote in the margins of my life
i kept them all
because whether or not you knew it
i showed you all
of my
broken
little
pieces
and you
asked me
if they had a voice
what would they say.
yeah.
i will never send this letter. and i will never write that book.
but if i did
i would want you to read it
so that you can see
how those 5 words that you wrote to me
changed my life
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