won't you tell me what you're thinking of, would you be an outlaw for my love?

i've been thinking about texting you but i haven't.  i mean, i did (text you) but like, you didn't respond. 

and that's okay, you know, to like, not answer a text.  especially my text.  it wasn't really important anyway.  i mean, it was completely not important.  so yeah.  i guess it really didn't merit a response anyway.  but then a couple weeks later, i emailed you and you didn't respond to that either.

but there is no law that says you need to respond to me-- in a timely manner or at all.  we get so many texts and emails and phone calls that it starts to feel like a chore, right?  keeping up with like, people.

i'm the worst-- i do it all the time.  that's what i keep telling myself when i look and see no response.  from you.

it's funny- i've gotten used to that from you.  so i don't know why i care.  especially now.

i guess because we had sort of been talking more recently i kind of got used it.  maybe a little too used to it.  (if that is even possible, with like, people that you know.)

whatever. 

i should be making dinner for t right now instead of writing to you. 

he was gone last night and i missed him.  before he had to go he wrote me a note and left it on my pillow.  i don't know why it surprised me because he does these really sweet things like, all the time.  sometimes we are living, like so close to each other, that i forget to see all that he is.  and being away from him helped me remember.  the hours were long because we haven't spent a night apart in years and even though it's only been 24 hours, i can't wait for him to walk through the door.

he will sit down on the black chair and i will sit down on his knee to listen as he tells me about his day.  he will twist a lock of my hair between his fingers as i tell him about mine.  and i will remember the way he looks at me, like if he could, he would keep me in that moment forever, closed inside of a locket.

two perfect pictures.

him and me.